Would YOU attend preschool…for adults?

This was the correct story for the Bluff the Listener game on NPR’s Wait Wait Don’t Me. An adult preschool in…wait for it…Brooklyn!

It’s called Preschool Mastermind, and it gives adults the chance to get in touch with their inner child—arts and crafts, show and tell, even naptime. Of course, it comes with a price, though I have to give credit—it’s a sliding scale fee, from $399 to $999, for a month’s worth of preschool.

I’m not gonna try to understand this. Maybe it’s a generational thing. I didn’t have the benefit of preschool when I was a toddler. I remember when the federal government created the Headstart program. I was in junior high school by then. But the younger of my two brothers, born in 1970, was a Headstart baby. Many would argue that the Headstart program was the government’s response to the Black Panthers’ breakfast program. While I didn’t get to go to preschool, I attended kindergarten at my local public school. I had a lot of fun in kindergarten, but I have no desire to relive the experience now that I’m a grownup.

As the Bible says (1 Corinthians 13:11), “When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.” There’s nothing wrong with looking at the world through fresh (or refreshed) lens, and approach each new experience with the wonder of a child. But there’s a reason why human beings are adults for a far longer time than they are children. If one can’t take on their adult responsibilities and still maintain a child-like outlook, then frankly, I don’t think a month’s worth of adult preschool is going to help.

And right now we’re in the enrollment period for the NYC’s pre-K program in the public schools. I can’t help thinking that the same people ponying up to a thousand dollars to relive their childhood also have the means to place their children in an exclusive pre-school program. They don’t have to compete for the limited number of slots for free pre-K, often in schools where children attend class in closets and trailers.

But I guess this goes the way of everything else in our grown-up lives. You make it…somebody’s gonna pay for it.


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